Why You’re Not Lazy: Understanding Depression and Anxiety
According to the WHO, more than 330 million people are living with depression, while the number is even higher for those struggling with anxiety disorders.
Friends, loved ones, or even the person themselves too often dismiss the struggle as laziness or an unwillingness to change. Yet what looks like “not trying” is actually the brain struggling to cope under immense emotional strain.
If you’re reading this, you most likely understand the darkness of depression and anxiety, or you may be going through it right now. Understanding what’s happening in the body can be your first step towards healing and lasting recovery.
Why are depression and anxiety often mistaken for laziness?
In today’s tech age, a million productivity videos await at any idle moment. One flick of your fingertips and you can find yourself spiralling into productivity hacks, from cooking to travelling the world.
Our culture has grown to idolise productivity, at any cost. Taking a moment to slow down can be enough to make us feel like a failure. When we are feeling low, or even when we just don’t feel like ourselves, it almost becomes second nature to label ourselves as “lazy.” Yet in many cases, operating behind that label are the weights of depression and anxiety.
Both conditions will deplete the brain of its natural drive and capacity for focus. Even the smallest day-to-day tasks can start to feel like an uphill struggle. Others might see us as being unwilling to get up and go, but depression and anxiety can emotionally and physically deplete us.
It’s important to remember that this isn’t a question of willpower. People living with chronic depression or anxiety are often fighting their own biology. What looks like procrastination to some is actually the body’s way of trying to get by.
Understanding this distinction is crucial to breaking the stigma that still surrounds mental health. A person isn’t choosing to fall behind; they are often doing their best to get by each day, while carrying a burden that others can’t see.
The science behind motivation loss in depression and anxiety
When depression and anxiety take hold, a loss of motivation can be pinpointed to chemical changes that are happening in the body and mind.
How depression hijacks the brain and body
Prolonged depression will alter how your brain communicates with the rest of your body. It usually uses neurotransmitters like serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine to regulate the way you feel. When depressed, these signals weaken. According to the NHS, depression causes physical fatigue, poor sleep and appetite changes, leaving the body in a persistent state of low energy. Further research from Nature Reviews Neuroscience shows that long-term disruptions in these pathways will significantly reduce motivation and lead to feelings of helplessness.
How anxiety leads us to paralysis
Anxiety is understood to trigger our body’s fight-or-flight system, which is a survival response designed for short bursts of danger. When we have to live with chronic anxiety, cortisol levels stay elevated, so a person stays on alert long after any threat has passed. A Harvard Medical School review found that this constant stress response can result in profound restlessness, as well as racing thoughts and exhaustion. Many people struggling with chronic anxiety feel like they’re paralysed between wanting to act, but feeling frozen by a fear of failure, or judgement from others.
How depression can manifest (which does not equal “laziness”)
A lot of the time, these conditions won’t involve tears or visible sadness. Instead, they can hide behind our silence and the exhaustion that comes from just getting through the day.
Below are a few signs of depression and anxiety manifesting:
- You’re sleeping too much, but you still feel exhausted
- You keep up appearances in public, but feel like crumbling when no one is watching
- You’re hard on yourself for not “doing more,” even though you’re trying your hardest
- Hobbies and activities that once brought comfort now feel flat and meaningless
- Even small tasks like cooking, showering or tidying feel like mountains to climb
- You need constant distractions to stop feeling numb
- Messages pile up because replying to people doesn’t seem worth it
- Your hygiene slips, or you stop paying attention to grooming yourself
Noticing these signs does not equate to a flaw in character or motivation. They are showing that you are more likely to be unwell than unwilling.
Understanding mental health means rejecting the “lazy” label
Especially during prolonged periods of depression, we can lose sight of the people we love and start to isolate, believing that we have to shoulder our own responsibilities. At those moments, many of us start to doubt ourselves, becoming critical of how we handle emotions when it may be beyond our control.
The term “lazy” ignores the reality of mental health. It overlooks the way depression slows brain functioning, or how anxiety floods the body with stress hormones..
Being quick to label yourself as “lazy” will only deepen the wound. Self-criticism can become the fuel for the cycle that depression and anxiety feed on. Recognising these patterns for what they are, symptoms not shortcomings, is the first act of compassion towards your healing.
Coping with depression and anxiety: small steps for lasting change
If you’re struggling to get through waves of depression and anxiety, it can help to remember that recovery doesn’t begin with massive leaps. It is instigated by small, consistent steps that help you slowly reclaim stability.
Here are some techniques to try to help keep you grounded:
- Break big goals into smaller ones: Dedicate some time to smaller tasks and be mindful as you do them. Laundry, messaging a loved one, or stepping out for a walk are all acts of progress when your energy is low.
- Don’t be afraid to challenge self-blame: Every time you hear that inner voice say something hurtful, try to mentally step back and challenge what is said. You are not weak; you do deserve help, and you can get through this.
- Dedicate moments of calm for your body and mind: Remember to be kind to yourself. At times, it can be helpful to treat yourself in the same way you would treat your own child. Would you let them stay up late, engage in constant negative self-talk or eat improper meals?
- Prioritise connection over isolation: Remember that isolation is only likely to worsen symptoms. Your relationships with loved ones can be an anchor during stormy times. Family, support groups and therapy can help restore a sense of connection.
Every step you take, no matter how small, can be a declaration that you can and are still moving forward.
Where can I find help for depression and anxiety?
If you’ve been battling low energy, constant worry, or feelings of failure, please remember that it is not always your fault. You could be coping with an issue that demands outside support and understanding.
At Providence Projects we specialise in addiction support, helping people address depression, anxiety and any underlying drivers that are worsening distress. Our treatment pathway makes use of evidence-based therapies and medical support during both our primary care treatment and secondary care treatment to help you rebuild the life you strive for.
Reach out to Providence Projects today and take the first step towards feeling like yourself again; calmer, stronger and ready to heal.
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(Click here to see works cited)
- “Depressive Disorder (Depression).” World Health Organization, World Health Organization, www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/depression
- “Anxiety Disorders.” World Health Organization, World Health Organization, www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/anxiety-disorders
- NHS Choices, NHS, www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/depression-in-adults/overview/
- Wise, Roy A. “Dopamine, Learning and Motivation.” Nature News, Nature Publishing Group, www.nature.com/articles/nrn1406
- “Understanding the Stress Response.” Harvard Health, 3 Apr. 2024, www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/understanding-the-stress-response.